Love Letter

no longer waiting patiently for access,
all dressed up and gunning for it.
no longer craving attention,
all grown up and swimming in it.

years of bruised elbows and broken hearts to transcend to these heights,
bask in the glory of all this self-confidence.

dark skin and deep brown eyes, born in the fire,
quick wit, cold style, let it envelop the world.

kiss him in the streets of San Francisco, in alleways in New Orleans, on the beaches of Florida,
and hold back nothing.

two lessons, trite but true – not a thing can hurt you without your permission, and this life is what you make of it.

10/19

October is the salt on your lips, still stinging from our last kiss

Brighter than the final flash of light before sunset.

Open arms – in retrospect
say little, demand respect.

Cast as Caesar, then as Antony
righteous/wicked, passionate/weary.

Adventure and enduring love
all rolled into one.

October is the honey on your fingertips – lingering for a moment before you lick them clean.

It’s the death of innocence, of coveting the pristine.

It’s Fall Again

get carried off like carrion
arms limp, eyes pried open
gawking at the waning ground

floating free
clouds sliding past your feet
blood still hot and dripping from you

from scene to scene in vivid color
mistakes may appear larger than triumphs in the mirror
try not to be too alarmed

died to feel the burden of someone else’s thoughts,
the heat of passion, the shame of lust
rebelled a thousand times just fall in line, eventually

laughing at all the men you once thought you wanted to be
there are no bright lights here, no angels
only imperfect beings doing their best to survive

seeking refuge
seeking love
seeking meaning

Atheist Baptism

Two steps forward, one step back
paths divide like cells
all we sinners dressed in black
ringing mourning bells

stayed for a minute, in the
soft glow of the light
poised yet full of yearning
passion about you, hot and bright
desires disconcerting

We were two, then one, then two again,
as if we never even started
but that’s the flow of life
here one day, the next – departed.

Love(r)

lonely little lover sitting on the shelf, with plastic parts
all shiny and brand new and a tiny plastic heart
consumed with burning desire for you
“love her but it couldn’t work,” you know the old refrain and so years pass and you drift your separate ways.
maybe that’s all for the best, maybe you’re in love with being loved, just a lovely little loner spilling down the drain full of empty compliments and a desperate need to kiss away your pain,
it only hurts for a moment, an excruitaiting bliss, and then you’ve made it through,
that’s just the way
life works kid.

Jack Parsons

Beyond it, moving through the cosmos unbounded,
Test it with a few vinegar phrases, but those wounds have been healed now for ages,
what’s your motive anyhow? we’re just strangers with a familiar sense of each other’s coding,
How much progress occurs by way of quiet judgement?
Fuck it. We’re all hypocrites, but try to feel it,
Can’t relate? Well that’s alright,
just sit steady while the angel launches.

Connection

(talk to me) so cheap all it takes is some stimulating conversation.
Listen in intently and you might just lure out secrets I didn’t even know existed.
Is it love if you find yourself falling every fifteen seconds? Is is real,
does it matter if you both can feel it?
To be frank, can’t quite relate to my peers (never could),
and I don’t expect to be understood by the many anymore, just leaving this behind for the few,
the bleeding hearts of the future to try to decipher,
on a cold night, when the wind howls and they’re searching for signs that they aren’t completely alone,
that the sadness isn’t forever,
that the void won’t devour them whole.